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Maybe it's because she's the splitting image of my arch nemesis, or maybe it just irks me that she's a bitchy little child who sings songs encouraging girls to steal other girls' boyfriends and goes on about how "punk rock" she is even though she's like, never heard of David Bowie, but I just. Can't. Stand. Avril. Lavigne. And even though apparently she can't seem to sell tickets to her concerts, Proctor & Gamble has decided to reward her with a lucrative fragrance contract, according to WWD. Ugh, can you imagine the ancillaries? Body lotion that smells like bubble gum and loogies? Barf.