Image via Valmont

It doesn't seem fair that you should have zits at the same time that you're fighting back the wrinkly, crêpe-y skin. I get the complexion of a low-budget horror movie zombie, complete with open wounds and sagging flesh if I do not practice constant vigilance with my 37-year-old complexion. What's up with that? A teenager's zits and grandma flesh? Clearly I'm in skin care purgatory.

But I think the good scientists at Valmont might know what to do with me. They created Adaptation Night ($185) to fight wrinkles after dark and Adaptation ($145) to control oil during the day. But maybe all you need to know is this: during the week I tested Adaptation, four different people asked if I was pregnant. I'd like to believe it was the combo-platter from Valmont--not the burrito I had during lunch. And hey, faking that kind of glow with product is a lot cheaper and easier than passing a baby through your cervix.