You already know that you shouldn't miss valuable sleep staying up late watching television, but if you do, you undoubtedly are already familiar with the onslaught of seriously longer-than-average commercials (almost like little three minute infomercials) that hit you when you're vulnerable (i.e. probably drunk). Check out this doozy for something called Kinoki. It's basically an Always Maxi Pad that you glue to the bottom of your feet and then in the morning, supposedly, all of the free radicals and toxins exit your body via these pads.

We all know that if you eat a bunch of junk food, it certainly comes pouring out of your complexion shortly afterward, so maybe this ancient Asian art is on the legit? Toxins by the hundreds, sucked out of my tootsies while I'm dreaming of Russell Crowe, all for the low price of $20 with shipping? Yeah, they're totally a gimmick.

A bunch of empty promises along with some junior high chemistry thrown in. It turns out that there is a very small bit of iron embedded in those pads, and when you sleep, your body's moisture basically works with the metal to make a chemical reaction (basically it rusts). There's your scary visible evidence of toxins! The gradual reduction in toxins over time happens because the pad's residue builds up on your foot gradually, reducing the chemical reaction.