Of course you want to check out the latest New York Times T Fashion and Beauty edition. But just in case you're busy today, I gave it a little read-through to report on the best of the beauty coverage to save you some time.

Loving this cute little number on spa terminology, penned by my adorable and amazing ex-assistant, Celia Ellenberg. I feel as proud of her as Lionel Richie must feel about Nicole now that she's all pregnant and straight-edge and all. Anyway, next time you're at the spa, order the Shiroabhyanganasya. Other gems from this issue include the Samurai Shopper's call to arms against skin care "cherry-picking" (the practice of choosing and using products all willy nilly) and strict adherence to a "system," which makes sense, being that you have to actually stick with a product (or series of salves) to get any noticeable results, unless of course you're using Joey NY products, which are all about making you look like Jocelyn Wildenstein on her way home from her surgeon's office (kidding!).

The S.S. reviews full service lines from conservative, old-school brands like Guinot, Kanebo, and Lucrèce. And, what did I tell you the other day about pumpkin being such a hot ingredient right now?! They recommend New York aesthetician extraordinaire Susan Ciminelli's $200 Pumpkin Plum Renewal Treatment, which I haven't tried yet. I can tell you, however, that I am O-B-S-E-S-S-E-D with Susan. Freakin'. Amazing. Woman. (More on her and her fabulous treatments later.) Of course, Susan's treat is a steal compared to this $750 diamond dust and caviar sesh. What's grosser than having your mug coated in sharp objects and fish eggs? Spending a grand (tip and gas money included) for the privilege. Okay, time for a quick round of "I Never." Or whatever. Would you ever spend that much on a facial? Lay it on me...